Lyrics George Formby - Chinese Laundry Blues

Lyrics George Formby - Chinese Laundry Blues

Now Mr. Wu was a laundry man in a shop with an old green door.
He'll iron all day your linen away, he really makes me sore.
He's lost his heart to a Chinese girl and his laundry's all gone wrong.
All day he'll flirt and scorch your shirt, that's why I'm singing this song.
Oh Mr. Wu, what shall I do, I'm feeling kind of Limehouse Chinese Laundry
Blues.
This funny feeling keeps round me stealing
Oh wont you throw your sweetheart over do.
My vest's so short that it won't fit my little brother.
And my new Sunday shirt has got a perforated rudder.
Mr. Wu, what shall I
I'm feeling kind of Limehouse Chinese Laundry Blues.
Now Mr. Nu, he's got a naughty eye that flickers.
You ought to see it wobble when he's ironing ladies blouses.
Mr. Wu, what shall I do, I'm feeling kind of Limehouse Chinese Laundry Blues.
Now Mr. Wu, he's got a laundry kind of tricky,
He'll starch my shirts and collars but he'll never touch my waistcoat..
Mr. Wu, what shall I do, I'm feeling kind of Limehouse Chinese Laundry Blues.

Lyrics George Formby - Noughts And Crosses

Lyrics George Formby - Noughts And Crosses

I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you
Than go to the pictures or the zoo
I'm very daft at dancing, at moonlight or romancing
I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you.

I've never been one for billiards or darts
I'm much too shy to play a game of hearts.
At dog tracks or the races I always lose my braces
I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you.

Here I am, a funny sort of guy, I wouldn't dare to hold your hand
Let's begin, maybe I'll let you win, I hope that you understand
Sitting around a table for two, that's the only thing I want to do
There's something cute about you, I couldn't do without you

Playing a simple game, tell me you feel the same
I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you.

I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you
Than take you to a French non-stop revue.
It may not be so funny, but still it saves me money.
I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you.

I haven't the manly figure for sports,
I never think I look my best in shorts.
I lose my breath at biking and as for that mixed hiking
I'd rather play noughts and crosses with you.

One fine day, if luck should come my way, we'll have a little kitchenette.
You and me, and when we've had our tea, I hope that you won't forget

Playing at noughts and crosses with you
That's the only way that I can woo
Though now you're far above me, in time you'll learn to love me
Isn't it bold and bad - but I feel a lad.
Playing at noughts and crosses with you.

Lyrics George Formby - Aunty Maggies Homemade Remedy

Lyrics George Formby - Aunty Maggies Homemade Remedy

Now there's all sorts of medicines that you can buy
No matter what ailment youve got
But I know a special one you ought to try
Youll find it's the best of the lot
Its my Auntie Maggies home made remedy, it's guaranteed never to fail
That's the stuff that will do the trick
Its sold at every chemist for "one and a kick".
Now if youve got lumbago, rheumatics or gout, or a pain in your Robert E. Lee
Don't kick up a shindy, you'll never get windy with Auntie Maggies Remedy
If you set your alarm clock for eight in the morning
Youre bound to wake up I'll agree
But I'll bet you by heaven, you'll wake up at seven
With my Auntie Maggies Remedy
In a young ladys bedroom I went by mistake
My intentions were honest you see
She shouted with laughter, "I know what you're after
Its my Auntie Maggies Remedy. "
Oh my Auntie Maggies home made remedy, it's guaranteed never to fail
That's the stuff that will do the trick
Its sold at every chemist for "one and a kick".
Now if youve got lumbago, rheumatics or gout, or a pain in your Robert E. Lee
Don't kick up a shindy, you'll never get windy with Auntie Maggies Remedy
Now when the baby starts crying, there's always a reason
And if you inspect him you'll see,
The poor little chappy has covered his nappy
With Auntie Maggies Remedy
Now I went to a doctor, I wasn't too well
And he made me lie on a settee
He said "there's trouble brewing, youve been overdoing
Your Auntie Maggies Remedy. "
Now I know a girl who was putting on weight,
In a spot where it just shouldn't be
So I said to Nellie, "Now you rub your ankle, with Auntie Maggies Remedy."
Additional Verse
Now one day at the races, the hors that I backed
Could have won it was easy to see
But the trainer said after "it would have gone faster
With aunty Maggies remedy"

Lyrics George Formby - Biceps, Muscle And Brawn

Lyrics George Formby - Biceps, Muscle And Brawn

Why am I forgotten, by the girl I love, because my clothes hang on me like a
sack.
I know I'm not athletic and look a bit pathetic, and wear most of my chest
upon my back.
The nation's got an A1 plan, and I might turn into a man,
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.

I'd grow spinach on my chest, where the birds could build a nest
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.
In competitions, exhibitions, Catch as Catch Catch,
I would win some lovely cups and saucers to match.
The girls would all love my physique, I'd let them see it twice a week,
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.

My ribs at knock knock, wouldn't play or rattle on a windy day,
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.
Hercules was far from slim, but I could show them more than him
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.
In competitions, exhibitions, Catch as Catch Catch,
I would win some lovely cups and sauces to match.

The ladies "white hope" I would be, they'd hope to see much more of me
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.
I'd look swell when out of doors, in my fifty bob plus fours,
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.

My photo in the press you'd see, to show what "bile beans" did for me
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.
In competitions, exhibitions, Catch as Catch Catch,
I would win some lovely cups and sauces to match.
I'd have strength to carry on and something good to sit upon,
If I'd Biceps, Muscle and Brawn.